Traumatic Experience

This post isn't about Westie's, though it was nice to have my warm Westies by my side while I was thinking about the experience: We had a traumatic experience in our house today. My oldest son, who is 15, went on his first “official” date. He took a girl to the movies. Of course he isn’t old enough to drive yet so I drove him to the theatre and dropped him off. The girl’s family brought her and stayed for another movie so my son had to meet them. On the ride over he was extremely nervous at, not only his first date, but the prospect of having to meet her family.

The traumatic part comes in when I had to drop him off. I walked into the theatre with him because he wanted me to meet the girl. When we got there she came running up to my son and gave him a big hug. I was secretly pleased to see that it totally took my son by surprise and he took up the penguin stance. You know the penguin stance – where you stand perfectly still with your arms at your side. He did lean a little back and his hands flopped a tad when he took the brunt of her body hitting his but he certainly was too shocked to return the hug.

However, that wasn’t the traumatic part. When the girl finally realized I was standing there we said hello and shook hands and she was very nice. The traumatic part was when I walked out of the theatre for the drive home. As I walked to the car I had a big smile on my face because I was so happy for my son that he is growing up and has found a girl that seems to really like him. That lasted about 5 minutes until I was crushed by the sudden realization that my son is growing up and has found a girl that seems to really like him. My next thought was, oh my gosh how did this happen???? I know that he’s been taller than me for a while and that his voice is low enough to sing bass in chorus but, wait a minute, wasn’t it just yesterday that we were buying him a tricycle for Christmas and he thought girls were gross (all girls except for me because I was just mom, not really thought of as a girl)??? I immediately called my partner in parenthood, my husband, and choking through my hysteria had him talk me down from the pinnacle of sadness I was climbing to. Before long he had me laughing, as he always is so good at doing, and realizing that this is how life is suppose to work.

When I got home I threw myself into yard work so I didn’t have to think about my son at the movies with a girl. And then I remembered something. As we were waiting inside the movie theatre doors and I was asking my son how he was doing before the girl got there, he said to me, “You’re not going to leave me, are you?” He meant before the girl got there but I believe I saw the grace of God right then, telling me that my job isn’t quite over yet, that there is still work to be done.

I sent my husband to pick my son up when the movie ended. I had way too much yard work still to complete, or so I told him. The girl, my son, and her family came out of the movie theatre together and everyone was introduced to each other. As I worked alone in the garden that afternoon, I thought again of my son’s question, “You’re not going to leave me, are you?” Right then, in my heart, I was asking him the same thing.